Summertime
Summertime
Songs : “In the Summertime” by Mungo Jerry
“I Was Country When Country Wasnt Cool”, originally by Barbara Mandrell, performed by Martina McBride and George Strait
“Tennessee Waltz” by Patsy Cline
Chapter 14
A year has passed since they’ve met, and despite breaking up, fights, drinking, occasional drug binges, complex family dynamics, jealousy and a lot more, they’ve made it. Put together, their relationship really only lasted about 7 months, but the time period was enough to last a lifetime.
Caleb’s only request was that she spend his birthday with him, even if it were months away. Last birthday he was alone, feeling down, thinking of her, and he didn’t want to spend another birthday without her.
“So I was loving on Rachel Bilson my last birthday.”
They were in Caleb’s Nashville house. The windows were open and a breeze billowed in, bringing in warm night air. Half-opened luggage was strewn all over the living room. They had returned from Scotland earlier in the day, after a series of concerts, where the band had played a lot of new material.
“Rachel Bilson? From the O.C.?”
There was nothing in the fridge, so they had ordered pizza and salad from a neighborhood pizza joint that Caleb liked. He poured her more wine and nodded. She chewed her pizza and shook her head.
“You are weird. You have the strangest celebrity crushes.”
He shrugged and said defensively,
“Whatever…she reminded me of you. And I was in LA, feeling down. Turning quarter of a century old and nothing to show for it.”
“Apparently, every brunette reminds you of me,” she chuckled, “prostitutes from Arizona, Rachel Bilson, anyone else?”
“Lily,”
“Oh yes, Lily.”
The thin, dark-haired model that Caleb had “befriended” at Coachella a few months back.
Lily was quiet and agreeable, and she served as the “official girlfriend” with relish.
After the family reunion, Caleb had assumed that now he could come out into the world with his girlfriend, and he even offered the “position” to her. But she balked. There were some hard times between them for a few weeks. He couldn’t understand her motivations. He was the man, he promised to “take care” of her. She’d live a good life. She didn’t argue. Yet even for him, she didn’t want to change the course of her life so drastically as to give up on all her dreams, her education, her plans. Caleb was not exactly the picture of stability, and while she loved him, she wasn’t looking to be a “kept woman”. At 21, she wasn’t ready to get married or make life-altering changes to her life. Besides, she wasn’t a big fan of his lifestyle either—the endless moving around, packing, unpacking, faceless hotel rooms, bars, press conferences and interviews. It got old very quickly. After England, Ireland and Scotland the entire trip blurred into one continuous disarray of images and faces. After six weeks, she was exhausted and uninterested. Never did returning to Nashville seemed such a welcome idea.
“Lily does look like you,” he said, finishing his slice and picking up the next.
“No, I want the one with the mushrooms!” she complained. “You eat the peppers.”
With a smile, he complied, put down the slice and picked up the one with the green peppers.
“Thanks. You are such a good boyfriend. Yeah, she does. You sure do have a type,” she agreed.
Caleb was angry with her , after she had refused him, and bolted to Spain with Lily. Apparently, they had enjoyed nude beaches and nice hotels, as well as a fine golf course there.
Curiously, she was not angry with him, and neither did she resent Lily or was particularly jealous of the relationship. In truth, Caleb was a handful, and he wasn’t ready to renounce his ways, and many a times she did not want to deal with his tantrums and moodiness, his drinking, and bickering with everyone from Nathan to her.
It took her some time to accept things as they are, to accept him for the man that he was. She knew that with time, he would probably settle down and find himself, but right now, Caleb Followill just wasn’t cut out to be a one-woman man. He feared relationships, and all the ties that they brought with them. Yet he also loved her. Deeply. Passionately. Sexually. At times, obsessively. No one could satisfy him quite as she did, either physically or emotionally. With her, he found solace, and “home”. And he was her one and only love, so she opted to take the good with the bad. She knew where she stood with him, and it didn’t worry her that there was another woman, who bore the brunt of his bad behavior, the hate of ever-increasing number of female fans, and who got photographed with him at events. She had him exactly where and how she wanted him.
She might have felt differently, if not for one momentous event back in June.
Nathan had proposed to Jessie at her parents’ restaurant, in New Jersey.
The band was in the vicinity, scheduled to play a few dates in NYC and Jersey, and she was there with Caleb. The proposal threw Caleb off and caused a massive amount of resentment and sadness—a lot more than anyone’s expect, including Caleb. On the night of, he presented his brother with a bottle of Cristal, returned to the hotel room, ran himself a bath and she was forced to listen to him weep for an hour after that. It was the most heartbreaking event that she had ever witnessed, fearful that Caleb was cutting his veins in the bathtub, yet knowing that coming in the bathroom would be completely inappropriate. When he finally emerged, drunk and devastated, he gave her a sorrowful kiss and embraced her tightly, whispering, “at least I have you”.
Then, it was business as usual. The show had to go on, interviews had to be given and concerts performed. But she knew that something broke inside of Caleb that evening, and that it would take a long time to mend, and that having her there meant more to him than anything else.
“You are prettier than Lily,” he added quickly.
She smiled and said,
“You don’t have to say that. I have brown hair and blue eyes, I am not as thin and have a lot more in the titties area,”
“Oh Lord, yes you do!” he exclaimed enthusiastically. “But still..I gotta say it, because it’s true. You have…I don’t know. More color or something!
She got up and yawned.
“Let’s go to bed. We’ll unpack tomorrow. I am falling off my feet.”
“You are weak!”
“Perhaps. But I am still tired. And no hanky-panky.”
“Ugh,” he grunted, “great! My evening is getting better and better. By the way, we can’t unpack tomorrow. Jared wants to show off his new rides. I promised we ‘d come to the farm. Also, I wanna check out my new four-wheeler.
“And we haven’t even seen the new property—all that land! Mud pits!”
She stroked his head and he pressed his cheek into her stomach.
“Tennessee boy. Getting all excited about mud pits.”
“Fly fishing!”
“Of course.”
“For a Tennessee girl, you are mighty snooty.”
“You have no idea,” she laughed.
In the morning, they got into Caleb’s truck and were on their way to Lebanon. On the way, they picked up Starbucks, Caleb being a coffeholic particularly enjoyed a good latte. She didn’t care for Starbucks, and made a stop at McDonald’s, getting a regular coffee, and an Egg McMuffin with Sausage. While Caleb was making a face, looking at the hash brown and the sandwich with disdain, she savored her coffee.
“Can I have a bite?” he asked at last, as the aroma filled the car cabin.
She let him have a generous bite of the Egg McMuffin and he mumbled, with his mouth full,
“This aint bad.”
“Beats granola from Starbucks for $6.”
“You may have a point.”
He wolfed down the hash brown in its entirety, and finished most of the sandwich as well. She hid a smile, watching him.
Caleb opened the window and the strong wind on the highway picked up her hair and it fluttered wildly about her face and neck.
“Listen to this,” he said, blaring Mungo Jerry’s “In the Summertime”.
“Got women on your mind?” she laughed.
He nodded and squeezed her thigh in his large palm.
“So because my daddy is rich, you took me out for a meal?” she inquired humorously.
“I took you out because I liked you, regardless of your daddy,” then he thought and added, “yeah, I guess you are right. Such a princess—couldn’t just boink you in the back of the bus. Had to go the proper route.”
She didn’t respond, but put her head on his shoulder and sat still. He wrapped his arm around her and said,
“I remember taking a different journey—from Jackson to Nashville. After I had quit my construction gig, and got in it with my boss, who warned Nacho and me that we’d “be back”. This was playing on the radio. And I was thinking, “man, I am fucking doing it! I am going to Nashville to be in a band!””
She leaned in and kissed his neck.
“You did it.”
“I did,” he nodded thoughtfully. “Weird how it happened.”
“No, no so weird. You are the most driven guy I’ve ever come across. Neither Nathan, not Jared have your drive. They couldn’t have done it. It takes someone like you to achieve things.
“You might have gotten crazy and drunk and mean and high, but at the end of the day, you knew how to bring it down and get in shape.
“Nate—he’s got a nice voice and is a good drummer, Jared—a smart kid, if babbles a lot of nonsense, Matt—a steady guitar player, kind and steadfast, but at the end of the day, if there is no Caleb, there is no Kings.”
“Well, yeah, I sing and write the songs.”
“That’s just part of it though. You have a vision. Not sure if anyone else does.”
They arrived to the farm around 11am and it was already buzzing with visitors.
Matt was zooming around in circles on his motorcycle, clearly eliciting jealousy from Jared and some other men.
Caleb watched them for a moment and then rolled his eyes and went to the house.
She knew perfectly well that Caleb didn’t like very fast machines, which left him at the mercy of his own capabilities. He was a very careful driver—sometimes too careful for her own liking, since she preferred a lot more speed—and the attraction of motorcycles was lost on him. He even fought with Jared over getting a motorcycle, and got BettyAnn involved, who pleaded with Jared not to get anything so dangerous. Jared, who was torn between Caleb’s sensibility and Matt’s love of danger and speed, finally settled on a moped. Of course, he claimed that he did so only to appease his mother.
Just as they threw their bags in the bedroom and Caleb ran downstairs to get a beer as if his life depended on it, Jared busted through the door.
“Jared!” she exclaimed, “knock!”
She just changed from her denim shorts into a skirt and was buttoning it when Jared intruded.
“Sorry. Okay, you ready? You wanna see it?”
“Oh, your new car?”
“Yes, yes. Where is Caleb? I want him to see it too. Come to the garage. Like now!”
“All right, all right. We’ll be there in a moment.”
Jared ran out.
She was convinced that he had ADD. Untreated, too.
She went downstairs and found Caleb. He was on his second bottle of Mickey Ultra.
“Ahhh, I like the skirt,” he winked at her, “you look hot!”
She laughed and took his hand,
“Come, let’s go. Before Jared starts crying. He wants his big bro’s approval, so be nice!”
“I am going to trash his new ride,” warned Caleb.
“You are an ass. Don’t you dare! You know, in Chinese medicine liver is connected to anger. Those who drink a lot, are trying to deal with their anger.”
Caleb sighed and said,
“Why can’t you read less books? Like maybe do a little more shopping. And be a normal girl.”
In the garage, at least ten people clustered around a car that was draped in canvas.
Someone opened the garage door and Jared, noting that Caleb was in the crowd, grabbed a corner of the coverlet and pulled it off with flare, like a magician.
A brand new, gleaming and sleek Infinity sparkled in the sunlight.
There was gushing and applause.
“That’s a sweet car,” she whispered to Caleb.
Instantly on the defensive, he growled,
“Okay, whatever, Lexus is even more prestigious!”
“It’s not a competition,” she reminded him.
Alisa, the newer, steady girlfriend squealed with delight, as if Jared was presenting her with the car. Caleb didn’t like Alisa, seeing her as a moocher, a “gold digging mother”, but Jared liked to have something steady and predictable in his life, so she stayed. The guys kicked the tires and inspected the interior, all with looks of experts on their faces, somber and serious, as if they were about to perform brain surgery.
“All right, you want to go?” she asked.
“No, wait. I want to see this car better,” said Caleb.
“Who wants to check out the four wheelers?” came a call from the outside.
And it was on to the next entertainment.
There was always something to do on the farm, hunting, shooting, fishing, the infamous mud pits, enough booze to fill a liquor store. Caleb held her hand, hanging in the back. The garage emptied quickly enough. He pressed the button, and the door began to slide downward.
“You know, it’s just a car,” she noted, “wheels, seats, some buttons…”
“It is,” Caleb’s warm breath bathed the back of her head.
He stood behind her, and wrapped his hand around her belly.
She walked slowly, to the front of the car and then felt his hand slip under the waistband of her skirt.
“What are you doing?” she murmured.
“Trying out Jared’s car…” he bit her ear gently, “to see what kind of ride it is.”
“oh, I am sure that it’s a nice ride,” she gasped, as he squeezed his arm under her skirt, and his warm palm cupped her eagerly, and he felt that familiar warmth, which fired him up with such intensity.
“Are you crazy?” she moaned, just as his lips trained down her neck and he pushed her closer to the hood of the car, “anyone can come in…”
“I know,” he said, but didn’t try to separate, but instead, carefully pushed her t-shirt up and over her breasts.
“Caleb,” she trembled and swaying, caught her footing and propped herself on the shiny surface of the car. There would be hell to pay, but she’d think of it later, she told herself.
Caleb was used to having semi-public sex, on the bus, backstage, in hotels, and it didn’t faze him much. What’s more, just a few weeks ago, back in England, he had to be restrained from pissing right in a hotel foyer, simply because the toilets were occupied and he didn’t feel like going back to his room. So swinging his dick in public wasn’t something that he abhorred to any degree.
He turned her around and took her face in his hand. In the smoldering heat of the garage, she felt a drop of sweat gather on her temple and in the darkness, he saw it and licked it with the tip of his tongue. His throat contracted over his Adam’s apple and she pressed her lips to the unshaven skin, while he rid her of her t-shirt and her bra. So be it, she figured. So she would be naked. Leaning over the cold steel of the car, she helped him out of his shirt and he stroked her shoulders and arms a little hesitantly, like he always did, as if afraid that she would somehow reject him. Then a slow, delicious kiss, tasting of salt and beer, and sensation of his still restrained passion, as her tongue passed over his lips. He bit her mouth softly, lips and tongue, his hand resting on the small of her back. A mass of his hair fell on his face, obscuring it a little from view and she inhaled his scent, grabbing at the wide span of his shoulders and bringing him closer, so that her engorged nipples scraped along his chest. He worked on her skirt, slipping it off her hips along with her underwear, his kisses a lot more urgent now, his fingers threaded with hers. With one strong push of his hips, he forced her upon the hood of the car, and she prayed that she wouldn’t dent the precious vehicle, but it was not the most important thing on her mind now, as his tongue licked her lips and then drew down her chin and her throat, the his chin scratching her tender flesh. Lovingly, he wrapped his tongue around her nipple and licked on it voraciously, and she bit her arm, to prevent herself from screaming too loudly. But he didn’t stop and licked and sucked until it hurt, yet she did not want it to end even for a second. His hot hands held her waist, and she squeezed the tough muscles of his back, which were smooth with sweat, lifting her legs high up and almost wrapping them around his shoulders. He let go of her nipple at last, but replaced his mouth with his hand, rolling it gently in his fingers, while he kissed her knees. Feeling the familiar ache in the pit of her stomach, she arched her back, pressing her sex into his groin, and he flashed a smile at her in the darkness.
“Oh, G-d, quit tormenting me,” she groaned.
Caleb laughed and said,
“A little more…maybe this would make you more amiable,”
Kissing the inside of her thigh, he licked on the thin skin of her hip and then slipped his tongue over the smooth pubic bone—Caleb emphatically did not like hair—before swiping his tongue over the surface of her womb. She moaned loudly, feeling his long hair drape her thighs and the thick fingers part her lips, while he circled his able tongue over her clit, languidly, without hurrying, taking his sweet time.
“Yum,” he muttered, licking his lips, kissing her navel and making her giggle at the comment, before going back to his slow, sensual, measured licking. She slid into him, tense, yet blissfully relaxed, loved up, coddled by this man. As he licked, he filled his hands with her breasts, lightly mashing them together, running his thick fingers over her nipples, his lips buried in her, the tongue steady and thorough—he was pleasuring himself just as much as he was her.
The cool hard surface of the Infinity was a welcome relief from all this stuffy, humid heat of the garage. A small window was open and it allowed a whiff of air, otherwise, the garage smelled pleasantly of oil, turpentine and tires and that glue, that makes you high.
She pressed his head a little deeper between her thighs, so it rested comfortably in her flesh, her hips lifted to his tongue, her clit throbbing against his teeth. She felt her loins flood with the familiar, numbing waves of pleasure, where there was nothing but the heat and the joy of his mouth and the ceaseless rhythm of his tongue.
Just as she shuddered for the first time, he tore his lips away from her slippery slit and didn’t let her savour the ecstatic moment in lonesome privacy, as he easily yet impatiently slid into her, fully, the heavy, smooth member thick and overwhelming, knocking her breath out of her chest. She screamed softly, still shivering and panting, just as he pushed deeply, budding his hot forehead against hers, kissing her slowly, letting her taste herself on his mouth. Her fingers curled over his shoulder and she kissed him, readily swallowing his tongue, biting the full lower lip, feeling him pull her over his member, so he was sheathed deeply, greedily. Hard and urgent, he thrust through her wetness, producing a string of pleased cries from her, burning through her passage with the bulk of his cock. Before she even stopped climaxing, the pleasure was reborn again, in her core, enveloping her, coiling around her swollen sex. Caleb kissed her continuously, his lips relentless, moving from her mouth to her breasts, kissing her hands, licking her fingers. His body was sleek and hard, muscles everywhere, not a soft spot on him, and she loved this firmness against her, and how her clitty bumped against his pubic bone, how the strong stomach rubbed over hers, and the big hand with familiar calluses stroked her hips and her thighs, while the other toyed with her breasts and her lips. She bit his fingers and he laughed, muttering,
“Careful you! Don’t bite the hand that feeds you.”
“Literally,” she smiled and bit him again.
Her hips ground against his, working in unison, bringing him to the brink and then letting go, teasing him, just as he teased her, squeezing him tightly, then releasing.
“I love you,’ he whispered, “like…oh Lord, I love you. You are just the best,”
She smiled and kissed him,
“You are the best as well. My Caleb. I love you too.”
The beautiful friction built within them and exploded at last, making Caleb groan loudly in her mouth, as he kissed her and caught her moans with his breath. She stroked his neck tenderly, her sex sucking tensely on him, her clit swelling against his hair, her back arched so high that he lay fully on her.
“Oh, G-d, G-d, more, more,” she pleaded, as release found her again and again. Her head swam with sweet, irresistible pleasure and he bit her shoulder softly, and she welcomed the brief pain, coming for him again.
“Ohhh, babe, that was awesome,” he vowed, kissing her, his hot, eager hands fondling her body, licking her neck and her breasts. She kissed the inside of his palm and stroked him lovingly, while he rested atop of her for quite some time, as his breathing returned to normal.
At last, he moved aside and she sat up.
“Oh my G-d, Jared will kill us,” she muttered.
The car was not dented, but it lost its luster, bearing the dull streaks of where their bodies were positioned.
Caleb made a face, biting his lip nervously.
“All right, we have to wipe it.”
Naked and sweating they grabbed their clothes and used them as rags, wiping the car frantically, trying to bring back the original shine.
Voices were heard outside. Someone was walking in the house. Motors were running.
“This will have to do,” said Caleb.
“He will murder us!”
“But it was a good ride, wasn’t it?” he smirked.
“Stupid man.”
She slipped on her t-shirt and her skirt, not bothering with the underwear.
He pulled on his shorts and carefully opened the door. Then he listened and at last motioned her to come out. She ran out and quickly went up the stairs, to the bedroom. Caleb followed her and then they showered together, washing off the sweat and the dust from the garage. Just as they were done, Caleb brought her into the bedroom, laid her on the bed and began making love to her once more.
“What the fuck! What happened! What is this?”
The frantic shouting woke them up.
It was late afternoon. They hadn’t come out from the bedroom for hours. At last, they were together, not on the bus, not in a hotel room, not pressed for time. They were home, and it was time to rest.
Caleb lifted his head off the pillow and listened.
“What the hell,” he muttered.
She lay on his chest and he stroked her head .
“Caleb!” Jared voice came closer and after a brief knock and without waiting for permission to come in, Jared burst in the room.
He stopped and looked at them. She pulled the sheet over her breasts and ran her fingers through her hair.
“What do you want?”
“Do you know what happened to my car?” asked Jared.
“What happened to you car?” inquired Caleb innocently.
“I don’t know…it’s like…it’s all messy. I don’t know what happened. It’s not shiny anymore.”
“How am I supposed to know why your car isn’t shiny?” Caleb shrugged.
Jared scratched his head, nervously rearranging his hair and said suspiciously,
“You were here? You didn’t go out?”
“Dude, I was sleeping. I don’t know anything about your car! Maybe when you were showing it off, too many people touched it?”
‘I don’t know,” mumbled Jared. “Maybe…I don’t know.”
“Can you please leave now,’ requested Caleb.
“Okay, whatever. This is weird.”
Jared was not placated, but he left the room.
“You are a good actor,” she chuckled and sat up.
He put his arm behind his head and caressed her bare back with his other hand.
“Poor Jared.”
“He’ll live.”
The evening started off well enough—Caleb went to grill for dinner, Nathan lounged about, cursing and making inappropriate jokes, Matt and Jared wouldn’t shut up about their cars, motorcycles and all other forms of transportation, Nacho wasn’t doing much, other than smoking lots of cigarettes.
“Want to get marshmallows and graham crackers for s’mores?” asked Jessie.
“Yes!” she jumped up, a little too readily.
“We’ll be back!” Jessie called out to Nathan, “start the fire!”
They ran to the car.
“Oh, G-d, thanks for saving me!”
Jessie laughed.
“I figured you wanted some saving. Sorry, she just isn’t the sharpest tool in the shed.”
Alisa had pegged her into a corner, and Jessie knew that she disliked Alisa. Jessie was a lot more tolerant, and she handled Alisa well, but not everyone was as charitable.
“You know me too well.”
“I know Caleb well,” laughed Jessie, “and what he thinks of her. And I know that you are way too educated to ever be friends with her.”
By the time they came back from the store, the party was well soaked with booze. There was beer and wine, and tequila had made its way from the cooler, as well as whiskey.
She saw the opened bottles of Johnny Walker and Jameson’s and wrinkled her nose. Caleb was not her favorite person when whiskey was involved. She even preferred drugs, like uppers, since he was not paranoid, but just chatty and jovial. Whiskey made him mean, if he crossed that line between buzzed and drunk. Inevitably, he usually did cross it.
They had burgers, with fancy fixins’, just as Caleb and Nathan liked it—there was a choice arugula, tapenade, roasted red peppers, feta, brie, aioli, caramelized onions, roasted garlic, thick cut bacon. They drunk good red wine and crunched on roasted corn on the cob smothered in lime butter.
It was a warm night, the stars were out and the moon hung low, like a giant slice of cheese. Nacho made quick margaritas, a squeeze of that and a splash of this, ice, salt, and they went down very well. It was all pleasant and civil, until the rambling began between the two usual suspects—Caleb and Nathan. One moment they were joking, friendly and peaceful, and just like that, the bickering started. First, it was about a song, then they began arguing about some event in their childhood, then it transferred to whom Ivan loved more—Nathan or Caleb or Jared—at that point Jared got involved and the yelling escalated.
Jessie and she tried to ignore it, but the still raw wound of the engagement, which was always present inside Caleb’s psyche, exploded. Accusation of abandonment began flying, peppered with “What the fuck am I supposed to do now? You have a woman, and you are moving on.” Stupidly, Alisa decided to get involved. The others knew better than to say anything to the brawling brothers, but she wanted to be the supportive girlfriend and said something in defense of Jared, thus bringing on Nathan’s wrath.
While the yelling continued, somehow, Caleb turned on her. Usually, she brushed it off and just attributed it to his drunkenness, but he was on a roll. She didn’t want to respond, but the quarrel expanded, with Jared getting in the middle of it, Caleb screaming at both of them, and then he and Jared were rolling the mud, with Nacho and Matt rushing to pull them apart. Jared grabbed an empty bottle and hurled it at Caleb’s head, knocking him on the temple and drawing blood. Caleb had to be dragged into the house—he was more mad with her, than with Jared, and kept shouting obscenities in her direction—while Jared stalked into the darkness, and Nacho rushed to be with Caleb and try to calm him down.
She didn’t want to show it, but tears ran down her face, as she cleaned up after the mayhem.
“Hey, don’t cry,” urged her Jessie, who was shaken herself. She’s experienced Nathan’s anger on more than one occasion, so she certainly knew how it felt. “Caleb could be such an asshole!”
“He…” she wiped her face, but tears kept coming and she didn’t finish.
“Yeah, they are like possessed. You never know what’s going to set them off.”
“Oh, I wish I could just go home…” she muttered, “I am so sick of it all.”
“Everyone is angry. It will blow over tomorrow. Caleb could be a schmuck, believe me, I know, but he is a good guy. And I think that he genuinely loves you. As much as he is capable of loving anyone.”
“I’ll go take a walk,” she decided.
“Don’t get lost,” smiled Jessie and patted her head.
She wandered away from the house, walking slowly and crying softly. She didn’t even know why she was so upset, but it was the fear for Caleb, for his slow self-destruction that worried her the most. He was only twenty-six, but she wondered what kind of damage he was causing himself and his body by all this drinking and drugging. He probably lived an equivalent of 47 years, in the span of his 26.
“Hey!”
She turned around and saw Jared a few feet away.
“Hi Jared.”
“Sorry about all that back there,” he said vaguely.
She shrugged.
“Wouldn’t be the first time, would it?”
“No,” he agreed. “But I got scared when I threw the bottle,” he admitted. “What if I had hurt him for real?”
“That’s the problem with getting wasted.”
Jared was definitely under the influence. The smell of alcohol hung heavily in the air.
He stumbled a little and she caught his arm.
“Let’s sit down.”
They plopped on the still-warm grass. The dew didn’t come yet, so it wasn’t damp.
“I am tired,” complained Jared, rubbing his head, mussing his precious hairdo, “fucking hate touring…coming back here…recording. All this shit. It never stops.”
“It affords you a good life,” she reminded him.
“Yeah…I don’t know. It’s like,” he thought, trying to come up with the right words, “like I am always second best.”
“Second best?”
“Yeah, to Caleb. Why is that? Like, he is always the funniest one, and all the girls, they fall at his feet,”
“You have plenty of admirers too, Jared,” she reasoned. “And Caleb is filled with issues, insecurities, problems. You are a lot more stable.”
“Well, what does it matter? That’s the problem—he is all messed up, fucked up on drugs, pukes during every concert, and still chicks find him all irresistible! How is it possible? Like look—I got Alisa,”
“Who is very nice,” she quickly interjected.
“Oh,” he waved his hand, “like I don’t know that you hate her,”
“I don’t hate her,”
“Well, whatever. I am saying, look, she is pretty and all, and a model,”
She didn’t comment, though she wasn’t aware of Alisa doing any modeling, anywhere. But that was besides the point.
“But,” he continued, “he still gets the goods. You aint even a model, you go to college!” he added with some disdain, “but you are like…I don’t know…classy. Makes me feel funny inside when I look at you. Because you are so beautiful!”
“Whoa, Jared, easy with the compliments!” she joked.
“But why? Why would you go for him? And not me?”
“It just happened that way,”
Jared suddenly leaned in and kissed her, pulling her close and pressing his mouth into hers.
She pulled her head back and exclaimed,
‘What are you doing?”
He pressed on and leaned over her, his thinness masking a surprisingly strong musculature. His grip was unfamiliar, brusque. She hasn’t been with anyone other than Caleb, so Jared’s smell, touch and physique seemed completely alien to her.
“Will you stop it!” she pushed at his shoulder with some strength, but he towered over her, like a steel cage.
“He won’t even know!” insisted Jared, kissing her slowly, not violent what so ever, but rather erotic, amorous. “He’ll be sleeping like a baby through the night.”
“Um…” she rolled her eyes, “I will know. And you. What are you now, a young rapist?”
“I am not raping you,” he contradicted, carefully clamping his hand over her breast, “I like it when you wear these cut-offs, you are sexy as hell! You have the longest legs in the world!”
She wiggled beneath him, but he held tight, his knee pushing between her legs, his arms gripping her strongly, his mouth searching along her collarbone, dipping into the warm spot between her breasts,
“Okay, that’s enough!” she exclaimed, seriously this time, pushing at him, “quit this nonsense, loverboy! Go to Alisa!”
‘Fuck Alisa!” groaned Jared, “I want you.”
“You are drunk,”
“So?”
“Jared! Get off me,”
They struggled against one another, both trying to achieve different goals, with him slipping his hand into her shorts.
“By the way, did you have sex on my car?” he inquired.
“What?” she pretended outrage, “you are completely insane?”
“Well, someone did!”
Suddenly, something tore Jared away and of off her. For a second, she feared that she’d see Caleb’s enraged face, but instead, Matt’s round, dimpled face loomed over her.
“Should I leave you two alone?” he asked.
She scrambled to her knees and said,
“No. No. Don’t leave. “
Jared stood, shamefaced, fidgeting.
“Everything is all right?” insisted Matt, looking at her with his clear blue eyes, a cigarette dangling from the corner of his mouth.
She didn’t know why she was blushing, and why she was all sweaty suddenly.
Matt’s flat, large hand squeezed Jared’s shoulder and he said,
“All right, we all done here?” he glared at Jared and added, “Alisa’s been looking for you.”
“Yeah, okay,” mumbled Jared and turning quickly, he disappeared in the darkness.
“Thank you,” she whispered.
“Here,” Matt gave her a cigarette. Her hands were shaking and she couldn’t manage the lighter, so he lit it for her. Though she didn’t smoke, this was a relief.
“You good?”
“Not really,” she admitted.
“Wonder what’s gotten into him,” he shrugged, “it’s usually not like Jared. I think he’s got the hots for you.”
“Yeah, you think?” she smiled crookedly.
“Thanks for not screaming. Wouldn’t want another slapfest between those two. I think Jared is a little freaked out being in a relationship, and this is the best he could think of. Hitting on you!”
“He was doing a little more than hitting.”
She shivered and Matt took off his flannel shirt and draped it over her shoulders.
“He resents you,”
“What for?”
“Loving Caleb too much, I guess. Letting Caleb get away with a lot of shit. I don’t know,” Matt took a sip of his beer and said, “all right, let’s go. Before Caleb wakes up and thinks that I wanted to have my way with you.”
She smiled and took a drag of her cigarette.
“I am sorry.”
Of course he was.
She didn’t come down for breakfast, and then stayed in her room during the day.
Truth be told, she was still jet lagged and she needed to do some work, so she worked on her laptop and took a nap. When she woke up, she read, emailed, texted, went downstairs, made herself a sandwich, then returned to her room to eat, and then fell asleep again.
Soft lips kissed her thigh, just below the hip.
She didn’t move.
“Why are you giving me the stink eye?” mewed Caleb, stroking her ankle gently, kissing her thigh, and moving her knickers to the side, he kissed her bottom. “I am sorry. I really am. Look, look, what I have for you,” in front of her eyes, he dangled a pretty chain with a crystal tulip—her favourite flower.
“Thank you for coming along on tour with us. I loved it. You being with me. I love you,” another loving caress along her leg and then a soft, slow kiss on her lips.
“Go away,” she said.
“Oh, it speaks! Good!” he rubbed his hands together with excitement. “Look at the pretty chain!”
“You can shove your chain up your,”
“Ahhh, how crass,” he shook his head, “and I was choosing it for so long.”
“Oh, I am sure. Probably sent Nacho to pick it out.”
“Nacho aint my bitch.”
“That’s exactly what Nacho is. Particularly when you yell at him during concerts.”
“It’s just the dynamics of the relationship.”
“Thank G-d Nacho beats your ass in everything! Pool, wall ball, baseball, shuffleboard. He is good at everything.”
Caleb was laughing.
“That’s my punishment? You lambasting me with Nacho’s achievements? All right, I’ll take it. “
“Why don’t you just leave me alone? And go yell at somebody else?”
He kissed her again and she turned her head away.
“No, honey, don’t be angry. Sure, I am an asshole at times,”
“Most of the time,”
“Most of the time,” he agreed, “but I love you. You are my sweet. Please forgive me. Please, please,” he stroked her cheek and kissed her repeatedly, hunched over her. She felt him slide on the bed behind her and turned her head to face him. He slipped the chain over her neck.
“Very pretty.”
“You know, I hate you?” she asked calmly.
“I know,” he nodded. “And I love you. For everything.”
“You should.”
She made a move to get up, but he was holding her, and when she said, “Can I go?” he shook his head and said “nah”.
In one motion, he lifted both of them off the pillows and pushed her carefully against the headboard. His hot erection bobbed into her back, as he kneeled behind her and pressed his palms into the wall, on either side of her head.
“Are you serious?” she muttered.
He bit the back of her neck and growled,
“If I don’t get my cock inside of you now, I will die. I will.”
Hurriedly, he fumbled behind her with his clothes, but she didn’t know what he was wearing, if anything at all. And then he roughly slipped her shirt over her arms, and her underwear gave way in no time, and she watched the thick, hairy arm wrap around her stomach.
“Tell me you forgive me,” he implored into her ear. He kissed her hotly, passionately, wetly, all over her face and neck and throat, his member growing behind her, smooth and warm, and so tempting. “I don’t want to do it as if I am taking it against your will,” he added.
She rubbed his arm and turned to kiss him.
“Can you try to be nice?”
“I will!” he vowed, ‘I am sorry. You are my angel. I love you so very much.”
“Well, I don’t want you to die,” she chuckled.
He laughed, that hoarse, cheerful laugh that sent a shudder of desire down her back. She turned to look at him. Face of a fallen angel, pure, but eyes full of mischief and sin. He was smoothly shaven today—for her, because that’s how she liked him—and she kissed the birthmark on his cheek, while he rubbed himself once, twice, and then pushed inside, and the expression on his face change to that of pure bliss. He exhaled loudly, with pleasure, grinding himself within her, instantly unstoppable, ravenous. He lived within her belly, deep and scorching, the thrusts rapid, hard, the big square palms squeezing her breasts not at all kindly. No place for gentle Caleb today. He bit her shoulder and then slipped his head under her arm, kissed her breast, and caught her nipple in his teeth, clamping over it and pulling. She squirmed, but held his head near, letting him suck. His roughness enflamed her so quickly and so fully, that in mere seconds she felt herself exploding all over him, as his grip tightened around her hip.
“I wasn’t the only one dying here,” he chuckled, dispensing with the delicacies and coming just as quickly. His body, arms especially tensed and he sucked her nipple hard, pulling all of it in his mouth, while she squeezed him, leaving marks on his skin.
They collapsed on the cool sheets together, limbs tangled, panting loudly.
She closed her eyes. Caleb’s head lay on her breast.
Late afternoon sun flooded the room, bathing it in gold.
Jared’s voice was heard outside.
Summertime in Tennessee.
